Another blog again here… I feel so moody now and I don’t know who should I go to??? Can I take half day leave as I really don’t wish to work now but can’t… If not, I will not having enough money to pay for my school fee… I know I shouldn’t put all my thinking to myself and making myself so irritating… Maybe everyone out there will think I am irritating and silly but I think I having a mild depression now… I like this guy also don’t have to gut to say as I scare to lose so keep to myself and I thinking not to tell him but don’t know whether is it worth I doing this… Will I regret??? Should I tell him…? What if I come back to this office to work again and how am I going to face him after I tell him… Will he hide away from me and wouldn’t want to be my friend… Have a crush for someone is so torturing for me as I never ever try before express my feeling towards a guy… If I really do so, this will be my first time and my last time to express to a guy…

Should I go see a doctor or should I take a long rest… I don’t like to be a failure and that’s why I don’t dare to express out… I know I can’t be with him so I won’t say out… But all my friends keep asking me to express my feelings towards him… Can I do so...? The answer is a “NO” which I long time knows it… No mood now and make me no mood to work and I wish to talk to someone now but who can I talk to and whose shoulder wants to lend me… Now I do talk to a guy from my office but he seen like getting misunderstanding from my words… All my girlfriends have their partner to lean to but me I only have wall to lean against… This whole year is not my year but why do gods make me meet Gabriel this year and can progress to a higher level which I want to have…

Oh yah today is my brother’s birthday… Happy 13^th year old birthday my baby brother… Stop thinking of the above matter… Wait for the time to arrive and I will know the result of this matter… Hope this will brighter my life for the next year…

~HiRoKo~